Counting down by the second

6 more business days. Seems like nothing after over a year and a half of dealing with this stuff. But really, 6 days feels like forever right now. They're still calling me into meetings, having me change processes that - let's be honest - will get dropped anyway once I leave, and apparently my input is still "valued and very important for the future of this company". Oh puh-lease.

I look back at my first interview, my first few weeks on the job, and I want to kick myself. Why didn't I see the signs? Well, I saw them, but as an inexperienced professional fresh out of college, I suppose I had no way of knowing what they really meant or could turn out to be.

I've put up with a lot over these past few months, and now I see fellow colleagues and friends going through the same struggles. I'm the lucky one - I'm getting to jump ship to safety before the whole boat goes under. I feel horrible for those who are stuck. There's too many good people, with talents that are being wasted. I want so badly to say "hang in there!", but I remember when family and friends told me that and I just wanted to smack them and scream "You just don't get how bad it is". I've signed documents I didn't agree with simply because I knew my job would be threatened if I didn't. Don't worry, I haven't broken laws, it's just simply about ethics. That's the irony in this whole thing...this company's premise is ethics. But really, when the dollar signs are visible, those go completely out the window.

I don't expect my new job to be drama-free or without debates of its own, but I am fairly confident that I will not encounter issues even close to the same degree of seriousness and frustration. Whether that is because I trust this new position to offer a legit company with genuine leaders, or because I'll be able to recognize the warning signs a little earlier this time around....who knows. I just know I'm going to be able to breathe a little easier and really know that I'm making a difference in a very important industry for all the right reasons.

Lucky, that's for sure

It's 3am and I am wide awake. The dog whined at 2:30...she had to pee. What?! We emptied her last night after puppy class....where does she store it all?! And of course she went right back to bed, but I could not. Once I'm up, I'm up. It's a curse, really. What better to do at 3am on a Tuesday than blog, right?

There's been something bothering me the past few days. I guess not "bothering", it's just something to think about. In my last post I talked about my new job. Since my job offer last Thursday I've talked to too many people and heard too many stories on TV (20/20, dateline, nightly news, etc.) about economic struggles, especially in regards to employment. It really is amazing, I think, that I stumbled upon this amazing opportunity and applied on a whim - I've applied for the identical title before, but I was always rejected for not having a certain level of experience in the field. Thank goodness that this company had standards that were inclusive of my experience and they appreciated all other non-clinical experience. All because they did their employer search from a different angle, my resume stood out. All because they read my resume beyond the first few lines, and really took the time to get to know me, I got the job. Too many times have I faced online applications that get lost in some Human Resources black hole, or was given less than a real chance at explaining my goals and accomplishments.

I know it's more than luck this time - I know I deserve and can do this job to a very high standard. But, why me? Out of all the people who are unemployed, why me? The timing couldn't be better - time to settle into a new, demanding job with months to adjust before entering married life. The money might mean a house by this fall, a less-financially stressful honeymoon, and the ability to pay off my stupid credit card faster. After a year of grief and frustration and sadness, I can't believe everything has fallen into place so perfectly.

I've always been a believer of "everything happens for a reason". I've kind of had to take that perspective when justifying many of my health issues that get in the way of being "normal". I look at my situation this way: Beyond luck, I am blessed. A year of struggle made me a better person and professional. Adam and I learned to handle my work-related anger together. We came up with back up plans, cut back on expenses since we were facing my unstable job situation, and most importantly, we were just there for each other. This won't change once I go back into the real world, but it's nice to know we survived a lot in the past year and it's all paid off. A huge weight has been lifted off of both our shoulders and it's so nice to feel like I can just glide into the next few adventures in front of me...

Freedom!!

All of this pain and suffering the past year is finally coming to an end, and may also end up being worth it. After 3 days of waiting, very impatiently, I received the call today - a job offer, inclusive of a massive (what I think is massive, anyway) raise, challenging but very interesting projects, and a laptop. I will be a Clinical Research Coordinator for a local private Nephrology (kidney) practice. I will travel up and down the front range in Denver visiting dialysis clinics, interacting with patients enrolled in our research studies. This is essentially what I am doing now at the IRB, just the complete other side of things....which is awesome! The hours are demanding and my commute will be at least 35 minutes each way, but it's all going to be worth it.

To think that I've finished my Masters AND found a "real" job all in a month is just incredible. I don't mind that this job isn't related to Forensics...my experience certainly applies, and I look forward to learning even more. This was definitely the first job interview where I felt like my education was appreciated, no matter the subject, and I felt very proud of my accomplishments.

I have been job hunting since January 2008 - on and off again I suppose -but the past few months have been very stressful. I have become increasingly unhappy at my current job, and am glad I am getting out before all hell breaks loose. Morale is especially low, and after some recent events within my department, I am very very anxious to get out of there. Money has been a big worry, too...with the wedding, honeymoon, school loans and basic expenses, it's been stressful. I have had little to no motivation to work my maximum 39.5 hours/week since this past spring, and that hurts when the paycheck gets deposited! I understand it's my fault for not working as many hours as I could, but if a company does nothing to help morale, what else is there? I am so glad to have found something that will be different and exciting enough to keep me motivated no matter how stressful or frustrating things could get.

I have yet to give notice at work, but my start date is February 9th. It's going to take every bit of patience I have to remain sane over these next few weeks....it's just nice to not only see the light at the end of the tunnel now, but to also see the reward outside of that tunnel without barriers in between.

Back to the blog

It's been a while...weeks maybe...since I last blogged. I blame my absence on numerous factors....
1) Adam's been off work the past 2 weeks and I have taken advantage of having him home to watch the dog, and I suppose it was nice spending time with HIM, too. =)
2) School's DONE! I officially graduated on the 19th. Yeah that was a biggy...I can actually read books from my bookshelf now...and there's no more Sundays filled with guilt about not getting my weekly readings done. Right now it still feels like I'm on school break, and I'm waiting for emails from Spring semester professors.
3) Job hunting - yeah, I'm back on track with this task unfortunately. My last interview didn't pan out (I'm overqualified...WHAT?!?!), which was a huge disappointment and has really caused me to refocus where I think I might be heading with this Masters. I see big decisions and changes on the horizon, but that's all I'll say for now.
4) Holidays & Family - but, of course! Christmas & New Years were great...we were able to spend plenty of time with both families, in fact, Adam's parents came over for Christmas dinner, which was a nice change to my family's usual plans. Callie had a great time playing with Adam's brother's dog, Leo - he's only 1, so he can keep up with our 14 week old puppy!

So now, with many of the big hurdles behind me & the holidays over, I go back to a "normal" schedule, minus school. Wedding planning continues as well....I'll spare you the details, don't worry. Adam's back to work today, which means I'm home alone with a crazy puppy while trying to work & keep the place decently clean. I'm just thankful that you can lock puppies up in their kennel when you need to take a shower or run an errand...too bad you can't do that with babies!!!!